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Thread: Yank Seeking Asylum

  1. #1
    Junior Member
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    Yank Seeking Asylum

    Howdy folks, need to introduce myself…
    I’m a 2 month old refugee from the tyrannical control of the organized drug cartel in the United States.
    Even though I did not support the cartel all the time during my 38 years as a drug user, I am guilty of enabling this organization for too long and way too much!

    I have helped by paying into this evil empire; to grow into a world of extortion and government corruption that would make the likes of Vladimir Lenin, Joseph Stalin and Mao Zedong proud.

    My apologies to those who detest supporting this blight upon humanity and the bad choices I have made.

    Even though I am only 67 days free of my addiction from the greatest killer of humans, I have evaded capture.

    The generous folks on this new-fangled spider web thingy have shown me how to get out of my prison of drug addiction.

    True, I enabled the Cartel buy paying the extortion, I humbly ask for your forgiveness.

    In my defense, I only paid pennies into the extortion racket for my pack a day drug use back in the 70’s.

    Then the drug dealer sold me the “Good Stuff”, with no extortion while on active military duty (AKA: duty free).
    Only cost me a 10 year contract, so what the hay, 2 packs a day and no extortion, I was young and dumb, don’t hate me!

    Well, now I'm on the run and hiding from the United States Internal Revenue Service, AKA, Jack booted thugs!
    They found out I quit paying the tobacco extortion they so cleverly called a sin tax .

    Those bastards are on ta me, I tell ya!

    It was that Oregon Revenue Tax man that got the US G-men on my arse, and the IRS is in hot pursuit!

    Hell, along with the IRS tax thugs, those damned National Security Administration storm troopers will be charging me for carrying dangerous Vaper contraband.
    And yes… the evil drug that has corrupted the youth of the world and caused grown men and women to commit acts of debauchery and run through the streets naked! Or so our Politically Correct non-smokers tell us.

    Yes folks, I am guilty of using and abusing NICOTINE!.

    I’m so sorry to my innocent Down Under Vapers, but the American NSA has most likely contacted the Australian Taxation Agents about your elicit nicotine abuse..

    With that said, would you kind folks mind if I seek asylum in this forum?
    For a Yank, I am trainable and have my own Vaping gear.

    PS, I’m not willing to give up my oldest, and ONLY drug addiction!
    You can take away my roasting and extraction paraphernalia after my heart stops beating and my carcass begins the long road down purification!
    Long live home roasted coffee and hand grinding for espresso!

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    I think you're going to fit in here quite nicely
    GirlyPantz and Porpoise like this.

  3. #3
    Senior Member
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    Welcome btw!!! I think I just hit the 2/3 month mark myself, how did you find the transition from the stinky-stinks??

  4. #4
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    Hmmmmm.

    A few questions before you can be admitted formally if you don't mind.

    1. American football or Aussie rules?

    2. full strength beer (ie more than 4.5 %) or that weak stuff the call beer in the us?

    3. What is the proper etiquette at a BBQ with regards to the roles of males v females

    4. Vaping gear - must get more shiney mods or meh Ecigalike is good enough.


    Answer the above correctly and your application for asylum will be given due consideration.





    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - now Free

  5. #5
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    Welcome NoBs. You are in a safe place now

    Grats on breaking free of the cartel after 38 years btw
    GirlyPantz likes this.

  6. #6
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    Sorry LizBiz,

    I would have to make a correction due to geographical and sensical reasons.

    Your pre-requisite question No.1 would also allow the asylum seeker to note Rugby League or Rugby as an acceptable answer. Being rugby league would score him a double point for the said question.



    Quote Originally Posted by LizBiz25 View Post
    Hmmmmm.

    A few questions before you can be admitted formally if you don't mind.

    1. American football or Rugby League, Rugby or Aussie rules (I suppose Netball is next)? Lol

    2. full strength beer (ie more than 4.5 %) or that weak stuff the call beer in the us?

    3. What is the proper etiquette at a BBQ with regards to the roles of males v females

    4. Vaping gear - must get more shiney mods or meh Ecigalike is good enough.


    Answer the above correctly and your application for asylum will be given due consideration.





    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - now Free

    Welcome NoBs, there are indeed a few around, but you would be the first self proclaimed.
    Last edited by Opdeemist; 09-10-13 at 02:26 PM.
    arjay55, GirlyPantz and Samtron like this.

  7. #7
    AVF Regular
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    I'm not fat, I just ate somebody who was.

  8. #8
    AVF Regular
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    Welcome! Have a Llama wick.

    Attached Images Attached Images
    fabricator4 likes this.

  9. #9
    Junior Member
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    Yank from Oregon
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    Quote Originally Posted by LizBiz25 View Post
    1. American football or Aussie rules?[/URL]
    Neither, Soccer and cricket, many a Decade ago! Mountain Biking now (that I can breath, anyway)
    Quote Originally Posted by LizBiz25 View Post
    2. full strength beer (ie more than 4.5 %) or that weak stuff the call beer in the us?[/URL]
    I live in a famous micro brew area. IPA's are popular, prefer dark stouts. Went from teat to coffee, then German lager.
    Quote Originally Posted by LizBiz25 View Post
    3. What is the proper etiquette at a BBQ with regards to the roles of males v females[/URL]
    Hell, I'm old school, I do the grill, the lady does the dressing. I'll get a chilled glass if she wants one, but straight from the bottle is just too sexy!
    Quote Originally Posted by LizBiz25 View Post
    4. Vaping gear - must get more shiney mods or meh Ecigalike is good enough.[/URL]
    Hmm, dang... (2) eGo 1100 on CE4 & CE5+ to start.
    In order of most usage: iTaste MPV (Version 1.5), iTaste VV v3.0, iTaste SVP & VAMO V3 (SS) on iclear i16 , i30 & Kanker Protank II.
    Right now my ADV is Boba's Bounty, Gorilla Juice & 7 leaves Tobacco.

    Funny, I just saw superman, AKA, "Clark" Kent [Brooks], I'm waiting on his confection(s) right now, that's just weird if you ask me.
    GirlyPantz, margyb, Rose and 1 others like this.

  10. #10
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    Yank from Oregon
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    Say, is anyone here familiar with Lidcome in Sydney
    An old hang out of mine...

 

 
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